Tired of the Assumption

You know being a ‘thick’ woman has always brought some good attention and of course some bad. So I’m gonna vent a little bit.

It’s flattering when those who don’t mind my soft curves whistle at me and speak in foreign languages as if I can understand them. In their eyes I may be beautiful enough to garner a second glance. Especially when the dome is done right; when I wear my braids on the side causing a sexy word or 2 or even 3. But there’s an assumption I have to curse at right now.

You think just because I’m not a size nothing that I’m vulnerable or desperate for attention? Do you think that I’m a target for men who think they see an easy goal for their own personal bullshit? Not so.  I've experienced early in my life just how not having the 'right look' can twist an impressionable mind way around.


Quiet, shy and  living on my own at an early age brought a wolf to my door.  He had an easy mark and he knew it.  Although I wasn't fat, I wasn't skinny either.  Perfect for a dog to dig his teeth into someone who didn't know any better.  Loooong story short, I learned early on after physical, mental & verbal abuse got me nothing but a broken heart and the loss of respect from my then employers, peers and relatives.  But the Blood of Jesus!! Never again!!

It may be a complete surprise to you, but most of us don’t suffer from  low self-esteem as low as you think. We are more dignified then many skinny ladies. Just because the world may say one friggin’ thing about ‘image’ doesn’t mean that we have to take bullshit from anyone who may feel that we don’t belong.

I am sooooo tired of hearing stories of how men ‘got into’ big girls because of THEIR insecurities and fear of rejection by skinny sistahs.  So they take 'what's next' and build a 'fan based' roster of ladies that might let them play their games for as long as she gives him her self worth.  But when she opens her eyes, what then?  How do you think that makes us feel? We are not second fiddles to those kinds of attitudes. You seem to forget something, weight comes off and if you’ve picked yourself a big girl ‘cause you had no other choice and the weight is now gone, where do you think that will leave YOU??


Then you mothersuckers who DO genuinely enjoy you some thickems like to hide that shit like it's the new 'closet gay'.  You get mad at yourselves for being attracted to one and so you walk around frontin' like you just caught 'something' in fear of someone finding out.  WTF???  Uh uhhh there is no dating after a certain time; no 'phone calls', no none of that shit!! For once in your little life time stop being a pussy and love whomever you want!!

It’s not fair to put ladies of thickness in a category to hurt them. It’s bad enough we are ridiculed to the point of killing that ass but for what? IT IS and YOU’RE not worth the stress.

I applaud the real men who love women.  Period.  


Creepy attitudes have got to change concerning anyone (thickems, gays, poorer citizens, 'hoodrats', whatever the fuck you think ain't valuable) whom society may feel doesn’t belong in a certain worldview. Karma is a fat bitch!!